Silent Night.

I like to talk -- a lot.  Not to mention that I am a lady, who most assuredly fits into the stereotype of "Chatty Cathie", to say the least.  And I have no shame in the matter...which is unfortunately the problem in this case.

Words tend to get me into trouble, to the point of complete consumption and total loss of self-control.  It is like trying to keep a secret all the time.  I use it [talking] as a sense of relief, as a way to confirm that what I am thinking is or is not as crazy as I am cooking it up to be.  It has become my excuse to never keep quiet.  Me and my big mouth…

But it is convicting.  I have been given self-control, but I simply choose to completely disregard its existence and run my mouth.  But how do I change something that I have been doing my whole life?  -- I humble myself.  I ask for help.  I stop talking.  

Now for about the past month, I have been giving myself the silent treatment.  The irony.  Instead of giving in to my habitual impulses to word vomit every little thought and/or feeling that comes into my head and proceeding to confide them in other humans, I say nothing.  I bring it to God and wait -- as I should have been doing all along. 

It is not easy (as most things in life are expected to be), especially for someone [me] who talks better than listens, who allows words to control thought processes and perspectives, slowly eating away at the soul; making it the end all be all.  I rely too much on what I think and what other people say rather than seeking for the truth, for peace in God. 

This is a process, to say the least.  Biting my tongue is now a common occurrence in my daily life, some times harder than other times.  But if the Lord brought me to it, I have no doubt that He will bring me through it.  I have His words to rely on, which is more than sufficient for me. 

When I choose to dwell on my thoughts and wait upon the Lord, in His timing, my eyes are opened -- an escape, a revelation, a resolution, growth, peace, freedom, an answer to prayer.  Keeping words between me and God simply demonstrates my reliance on Him, that I am giving up the total right to self and am believing He will provide me with what I am looking for.  

No talking necessary.  

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Geniuses, yet again. 

"A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of."

Luke 6:45